A New & Improve Me!
October 21, 2018
It’s time I say, “Thank You,” and I just did.
I am done hiding behind the fake smiles, ignoring the forgetful, and old lady jokes. You are looking at me as if you know me and I sound like a broken record when I say, “enough is enough.” I wonder how do you Not see me?
I am honest, for it’s too much trouble to cover a lie. Although, I admit I avoid some subjects, because I wouldn’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. I wish others felt the same way. I help when and where I can. I stopped going out for others, when it means putting myself out, and I’m okay with that. I’m looking at people and the world differently, because:
- I can’t go to heaven for you.
- Nor can I go to hell for you.
- I can’t tell you what to or not to do.
- I can’t tell you how to or not to feel.
- I have no control over your faith.
- And you can no none of these things for me either.
So, after I shared my list of things I am planning for my 50th birthday, and you tell me “ you are going to be alone for my birthday,” and laugh as if it’s going to be true. True I will not be able to go to Hawaii for my 50th birthday, (because it’s in 24 days) but I know I am not going to work on my special day.
I already knew I didn’t have that many friends (and I’m okay with that) and life gets in the way of fun. I made a list of things I wanted to do, because sometimes there are a lot of things to do and places to see in your own town that you are normally too busy to enjoy. Life is too short to not enjoy it. I go to work, church, the store, and to the laundromat. I rarely go out or get invited anywhere, so why not get out and enjoy yourself. If no one joins me (I’m cool with that). I am Never alone, because Jesus love is within me. How can I be alone?
My birthday list:
- Ihop – I like free pancakes.
- At least 2 museums.
- The movies. ( nothing I want to see until after the 15, so, that will be another day.
- Hot Wings.
- A nice restaurant.
- Flowers. (I will have to buy them myself, but I love “Me” and I am worth it.
- I want to go shopping, buy something I want and not need.
I am not an over the top person and if you knew me, then you would know this.
Okay, let’s move on. When I didn’t give you the response you wanted, it took you awhile to find something to say negative about me. “You too grown to have your hair looking like that” and had the nerve to rub my hair. I was too stun for words, because I washed my hair, conditioned it, and styled it like I wanted. It was then that I realized – I am going to be polite and keep her on an “hello and goodbye” kind of acquaintance.
I am ending this letter with the best wishes for you and yours. May you enjoy your life without putting anyone else down, because that’s not how you rise.