I had to stop playing my “Township” game, because it was 10:45am EST. I have gotten into the habit of enjoying my coffee as I watch the ladies from “The Real,” and have fifteen minutes to get ready. I had given up on getting my favorite coffee creamer, because every store I have been in for weeks. I found Amaretto – International Delight Coffee Creamer.
I kept on thinking about the cost of a manicure and a pedicure which was only $65.00. I believe that was a good deal. Yes, your fingers and toenails look cute, but what happen to you not having any money to pay back the $200.00 you owe me?
I know I no longer have stressed over things that were done to me or said to or about me. I had so many headaches and once I finally took control over my mind, my body just fell in line, and all that bad energy I was allowing to control me was gone.
To whom ye forgive any thing, I forgive also: for if I forgave any thing, to whom I forgave it, for your sakes forgave I it in the person of Christ;
2 Corinthians 2:10 KJV
I surprised myself when I saw a person’s name and their deed was brought back to life. I have spoken to this person, we may never be friends again, but I am not the one to hold onto grudges anymore. I say we are now passing friends.
What does the word friend mean to you?
- Two or more people who are close enough to know mood changes. If you are upset, they will know how to make you smile, and help you workout whatever it was that caused you to be upset. They do not run when you are going through a rough time. I wouldn’t even blink, but they would stop whatever you were doing and help out.
- You may not have always laughed at the same jokes, or liked the same movie, but everyone could agree that you enjoyed each other’s company.
- You knew when to give an encouraging word, or a calming hug when needed.
- You know you are in a safe place and there was no need to worry if you would be hurt, because you took your time to get to know the people in your circle. Trust and honesty and good values are what you saw and that’s why you called them your friend.
What is a passing friend? Is someone you once called a friend. You do not see yourself as their friend, but you still acknowledge them. If I saw Gina “whom I now consider a passing friend” I would greet her in a kind voice, ask how she was doing, and wish her well before I continued to walk away.
I will always wish that person not, but good health and a blessed life. Now before you get to be a passing friend, I have listened to you, I have tried to believe you, but a lie is a lie. So, I am good.
I read a book years ago and it always kept me from going back into any painful thoughts. “Having our say, The Delany Sisters the first 100 years,” by Amy Hill Hearth, Elizabeth Delany, and Sarah Louise Delany. https://g.co/kgs/wX7Ypp
I know I am looking at this through my eyes, but I don’t understand how she couldn’t do the same. I am a single parent who only had a part time job, without any help, and barely paying my bills. I had to go into secrecy and be out of work for six weeks. I BEGGED you to at least give me some if you couldn’t give me all of what you owe me.
I stopped calling as well as sending text for over a month. I totally ignored you whenever I saw you and kept it moving. You showed your true colors and I was done. Then one day you asked me to lunch and a ride home from service.
My first thought was to politely say, “no thank you,” but I didn’t. The small talk was cool at first, but after 30 minutes you didn’t say what I thought we were supposed to be talking about. I must have had a look on my face and you then started telling me about a lawsuit you were going through and how you were going to pay me back from that.
“I’m like really,” but kept those words to myself. The next day instead of taking me home from service you had to have her nails done. The whole time I was there I was thinking:
- I would start in the produce section: tomatoes, potatoes, onions, peppers, lettuce, spinach, carrots, lemons, and at least two fruits that were on sale.
- I would then make my way through each aisle: condiments,canned veggies,cereal and dried fruit, coffee and juice, cleaning supplies and tissue, frozen yogurts, milk, and some meat.
If there was anything left from that $65.00 I would have gotten some toothpaste or treated my son to a new book. I know baking soda works, but it doesn’t taste all that good.
My mind was blown away when you dropped me at my door and repeated how you would pay me back at a later time. I agreed with what the Delany sisters had said about forgiving, but you will always remember.
I am laughing, because Gina had the verse to say “You said I didn’t have to pay you back.” I told her what I really said which was, “I forgive you for not keeping your word in paying me back. May God bless you and enjoy your life.”
I made sure I blocked her phone number and her name from my facebook page and I have moved on. We still go to the same church and at first I just being polite to others who kept on asking me about her until one day I broke it down to them, how, and why I do not hang out with her anymore.
I didn’t want to go there, but enough was enough. And, yes those questions have stopped, and that’s a good thing. I may see her once in awhile and
Me : Hey. Gina : Hey how are you? Me : I’m fine. Glad the sun is out, have a good day. (And walk away)
I have suggested this being a passing friend to my son and he has agreed and does the same thing. It has worked for him as it did me. You are not hurting anyone’s feelings, unless they ask you why you no longer hanging out with them, but then again they already know.
Once a person sees that you are not going to turn back to them, they move on, and in the end you are better off without them. It is good to “Forgive & Let GO!”
Bye IV Now, LD* (1170 word count)